Thursday, August 14, 2014

Sloane's Birth Story

Once again, I'm writing this purely for my own benefit. I have the worst memory and being able to go back and read about Max's birth and see the photos is so amazing to have. There are small details that without reading it now or seeing it with my own eyes, I'd never know it.

To start I should explain that this time around when I got half-way through the pregnancy I realized that the traditional OB route wasn't working for me anymore. I had been reading everything I could get my hands on about the birth process and the current state of women's health. It disgusts me. I had epidurals with the boys only for the reason that I just thought that's what you do. Everything we see in the media and are told throughout life is that birth is the scariest and most horrific thing you will ever feel and experience physically as a woman. Scary stuff! For whatever reason this time I started thinking that I wanted to try a med-free birth, because well, I can. I'm supposed to. There is no good reason other than my own mental state that my body shouldn't be able to stand up to the challenge.

At my 24-week OB appointment I went in with a list of questions about how she and our hospital handles a natural birth. I was met with a cringe and the response, "well, you never know about those third babies…you might end up with a C-section!" and was wisked out of the room. That day I went home to find a new option. That's when I found Mountain Midwifery Center. These women are absolutely incredible. The level of care I received was more than I could ask for. They are the only freestanding birth center in the Denver area, and rest assured, all the concerns you could have are taken care of. We were at their orientation that weekend and signed up by Monday. The two biggest draws to MMC is that they are very hands-off in a good way, letting us trust our bodies, and also that I could actually deliver in the water. They are beyond knowledgable and the atmosphere they create makes you feel so at home, totally unlike a hospital. And at a hospital they'll only maybe let you labor in the tub, but then you have to hop out in the middle of contractions to push on your back. NO THANK YOU. The hospital we would have gone to only had one room that even had a tub!

With Carson being 8 days late and Max being 6 days late, I told everyone not to expect this one a day before our due date. I was right and somehow everyone else, including Carl, was shocked. Over the weekend just after our due date I had braxton hicks contractions off and on, but nothing really painful. Monday night was the same night I went into labor with Max (40wk 5d) and I told Carl it was going to happen that night. Sure enough, I got up to go to the bathroom at 1:50am and as soon as I got back in bed I had a really painful contraction. I laid there for about an hour timing what felt like the real deal, but they were all over the place. They tell you to follow the specific 6-1-1 rule, but mine were 3 minutes apart, then 10 minutes, then 7….. I knew I had to have an antibiotic IV because I was GBS+ again so that meant I'd have to be there for at least 4+ hours before actually delivering. Put that with being a third-time "wildcard" mom and it was tricky to know if I should call. I got up at 3am and called the midwife at 4:15am. She and I debated for a while and then decided I should come in to get checked. Worst case we'd come right back home before rush hour.

We got to MMC at 5:30am, right as the shift was changing over to Aubre. I got what was my very first check of the pregnancy (see, very hands-off in a good way) and found out I was 5-6 centimeters dilated. We weren't going anywhere! My first dose of penicillin was in by 6am and we laid around the room for about an hour, just chatting with nervous excitement. Around 7:00 Aubre suggested we go grab some breakfast and we could walk around for awhile. We grabbed some from a close drive through since I really didn't want to be that lady whose water broke in a very public way. It was a beautiful morning so we spent a couple hours just walking around the block, stopping every few minutes for a contraction. I would lean on Carl, bend over a little and sway my hips. It was the only thing that relieved the pain in that moment. At 10am we headed back in for my second antibiotic dose and because I was feeling quite tired and starting to get achy in my legs and my back. I felt myself not wanting to talk as much and actually tried to nap a little. That didn't last long as the contractions were getting more intense and I couldn't get any relief while lying on the bed. I loved using their sling that hung from the ceiling since that was the position that alleviated it the best.

At 10:45am I went over what I was feeling with our nurse and we decided it may be time to try the water. It was a little touchy because I was starting to enter real transition at that time, but you don't actually know it for sure in that moment. If you get in the water too soon you can get too relaxed and your labor can actually stall. But it didn't take long for my contractions to really ramp up. I was having to focus, go inward and truly work through these ones. I got my epidural at 7cm with Max so I didn't feel THESE types of labor pains. It was still manageable, but after 45ish minutes I started to get worried. My water hadn't broken yet and by 11:30 they were all coming 3 at a time. As soon as I'd feel that one would start to ease up, the next would go right into effect. I had a great student midwife, Renee, that stayed in the room with me the entire time while Aubre and our nurse attended to a postpartum appointment in the next room. She kept reassuring me that I was doing great and reminding me of what was probably happening in there. It is amazing that you can logically know the stages of labor, but when you are in it you can get so lost. I did have a few moments where I came back to reality in my head and knew I was getting close. They say that when you think you can't do it anymore, you are about to do it!

Around 11:55am I felt myself starting to panic. The contractions were so intense, my water hadn't broken and my breathing was getting erratic. I couldn't help it. Poor Carl sat right next to me outside the pool, asking what he could do, but really there was nothing. I was in "labor land" as they say and nothing externally was going to change anything. At this point I had been changing positions a lot because every set of contractions made me feel differently. I was on my hands and knees and I looked to the midwife for guidance. She told me on my next contraction I should try to make a low, deep noise and see if it helps. I did just that and as soon as I did I felt my water break, the baby dropped and she was crowning. It took my breath away. I quickly realized the nurse and Aubre weren't in the room and I was about ready to push. I know I said something like, "she's really coming now!" and Renee ran out of the room to get them. It felt like an eternity, but I'm sure it was only seconds before they were there and directing me. I know they directed me to push twice for the head, twice for her shoulders and once for the rest of her. It was the absolute most intense minute of my life.

It all happened so fast. As she came up out of the water, I flipped over and kind of stood up as they handed her to me. Right away I saw that our umbilical cord had just snapped in half. I don't totally know what happened in that moment, but I know these women were so amazingly calm and caught the issue before I knew it had even happened, clamping both sides off immediately. I do know Carl and I looked at each other for reassurance, but neither of us knew if this was a big deal or not. They deal with this stuff all the time so we had to ask if this was alright or a problem. They assured us that this happens sometimes and everything was fine since they got us both clamped so soon. The only problem was that the pool filled up with blood in those split seconds. It wasn't very pretty and I didn't get to have that intimate bonding time with Sloane in the water like I had been picturing. I really didn't want to stay too long in a pool of my own blood! They led me out of the water after a few minutes and I was able to get us warm in the bed. She started crying a little after we got into bed and didn't stop for a good 30 minutes. I tried to get her to latch for the first time, but she was crying too hard and wouldn't…..foreshadowing apparently. haha  But then once I got her to calm down and realize she could eat, she stopped crying and was fine. She's still like that after three weeks; she is totally chill unless she's hungry, or thinks she's hungry. If I don't go to her right away to feed her she gets frantic and then doesn't want to calm down.

We knew we'd go home after about 4 hours so we were trying to time letting the boys and Grandma come visit. Unfortunately they got stuck in traffic and missed her weight and overall check. Carl went with them into the other room to get her stats. The midwife came back in and said she was exactly 20 inches, but she'd let Carl tell me her weight. Since she was born exactly at 12:00 I guessed she was exactly 7 pounds. At my 40 week appointment they guessed 7-7.5 pounds then so I figured she would be high 7s just like the boys. He walked in with a big smile and said, "she's only 6 pounds 13 1/2 ounces!" I couldn't believe how small! The boys wanted to be a part of the experience and I think it was crucial in getting them on board with the whole idea of her really coming home. They've been a little too attentive to her in the first three weeks so I'd like to think they are already bonding too. She has a permanent crusty spot on her head where they constantly kiss her. It worked out great having her at noon since Max hadn't fallen asleep for nap yet. They were able to come for just long enough to meet her and see that I was okay and then go back home not long before we were getting ready to leave too. After they left Carl got some alone time with her while I took a much-needed herbal bath. We were happy and healthy and home by dinner time! EVERYONE told us the third was the wildcard so I think it is crazy that she came 6 days past my due date like Max and my labor was exactly 10 hours with both babies.

In all honesty I think I was in a bit of shock for at least an hour afterward. It was such a great, but INTENSE hour as she came roaring into the world. I was rocked for a good amount of time. I am so very happy that I did this all, but I am also glad I won't be doing it again. I won't lie and say it was all rainbows and tickles, but nothing my body couldn't handle. Laboring and having her in the water made the process so much more manageable as I was able to float and easily get myself into positions I couldn't otherwise. I'd 100% recommend this way of giving birth to anyone that was thinking about it! I'm finding it is like a secret club that many women are in, but not many are talking about. I want to scream from the rooftops about MMC and hope that I can do my part to help get their message out to other moms in our area.

Like I said, we were so in the moment that we didn't get a ton of photos. I didn't expect Carl to so what he did get I am so insanely grateful to have. These are some of my favorites. Unfortunately the ones with the boys didn't turn out great and I'm a little too exposed to share. But I do have them for myself which is all that counts!

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